And this time, I won't be back for six months. I try not to think about it, and I suppose that will be the only way I can get over it all. The thing is, don't think of how long it will take to get there, just do it.

These holidays have been great. I spent the last three weeks studying maths, going over old topics and revising with a tutor. Met with dad at least 4 or 5 times throughout the two months, and many more times with my cousins, Ji-Shen and Ji-Han. Caught up with all my homies, Su-Yi, Ew-Jun, Shaz, Nurie... Watched a total of 3 movies with friends. Celebrated one fscking awesome 18th birthday. Shopped till I dropped. Spent all my pocket money from December on Christmas presents. Managed to let my History Extension proposal (due next Wednesday, the 7th) slip away incompleted. Learned how to sing and play the guitar at the same time. Brushed up my skills on Singstar with Nurie, Ri and not to forget Ivan Chee xD. It was all great. Of course, it was definately short-lived. But then again, every holiday will be the same. Six weeks. 3 weeks. 2 weeks. They're all inevitably the same. You just have to make the best out of every single day.

I think I've got everything pretty much packed up. I'd run through all the categories (yes, I categorise what I pack) and ticked them off. Some I haven't completed yet, because I'm still using them (eg. Catch, clothes, toilettries). Otherwise, I'm pretty good to go.

Sigh. As usual, part of me wants to stay, and the other wants to go. I'm only one year away from completing my school career, and off I am to University. It gets closer and closer within my reach as the days go by, and each time I feel it, I want it more. And the more I want it, the more I want to stick my head in the storm and fight it like there's no tomorrow. I've been having so many doubts about whether I will do all the things I imagine myself doing - like studying at the school library after school till 5pm at least 3 times a week; going to the State Library more often to study on the weekends; going to the gym every Sunday morning; going to bed at 10.30pm every night; putting in at least 3-4 hours of study/homework every weekday. I wonder if what I say and boast about will ever be true, and it pulls me down sometimes to imagine myself not doing them. Last year was bullocks. I told myself I was going to study harder, lose weight and etc - I didn't, really. Not as well as I thought I could've done.

So this year, I really want to do it. I really want in. I'm going to counter-attack all the negative thoughts about "not making it" or "just a dream", because it will all happen. My target UAI of 90 will happen. Keeping fit while maintaining a well-balanced lifestyle will happen. Oh, it will.

I really better get some sleep now. When I arrive in Sydney, it'll be one fscking mad rush to the boarding house and getting everything in place before jumping into bed. For now, let's pray that 3 hours of sleep will keep me through most of the day spent on the plane.

See you on the other side,
Cheers...
to MSN, to Youtube, to btorrenting, to my queen sized bed, to cheap things/food/everything, to cable telly, to my own bathroom, to my PS2, to my lovely dog Pi, to Frank, to home. :(((((((((((((((((

It's been a while since I'd last blogged, and I apologise for that (if you have been continuously coming to check my blog). I've just been so terribly busy, that I haven't been able to find the time to just sit and collect my thoughts on what has been happening.

Nurie was in town for the past week, so we decided to take her under our roof for a few nights. We went shopping, met up with Ew-Jun, wrecked our voices out on Singstar with Ivan Chee, jammed on the guitars, watched Borat (FINALLY! WAWAWEE!) and some episodes of The Office... And t'was all great fun :)

Now, I am tired. I am exhausted from all the maths tutoring and tennis training in the mornings. I'm in need of a late night, and a late wake-up call. I'm in need of much sleep, and winding down. Especially before school - ah, before the start (literally, with all the old Year 12s gone now) of Year 12. I had played my last tennis competition on Saturday morning with the usual group under my coach, Khoo's wing. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to complete the entire match - with only three matches to go, I had to leave. It was sad, really. I was in the running for second place! :( Which reminds me, about today's Australian Open's Men's Singles Match - Federer rocked ass. He is now my new idol. For tennis. And my, err, performance.

In a way, I am looking forward to going back to Sydney. I'm looking forward to school. I want to live in a structured life or routine, one where I don't need to be continuously wondering what I will do the next morning, afternoon, breaktime, teatime and night. I like to have something I can really work towards, and in the right environment too. I really believe that if I'm at school, miles away from home and in a more confined structure/routine, I can work harder. I wouldn't have all the distractions I have today, back home.

I contradict myself. I don't want to go back, really. I want to stay here. The thought of not coming back for the next six months haunts me every day. It really hurts. I just don't see how I'm going to pull through with it. Of course, I'm definately not alone. I have Ew-Jun, who will meet with me at least once a month (our new deal!) - a meal, a movie or studying at the state library. Mum will be down a little more often too - one, my 18th birthday is 11-12 days from now; two, when I come back from the Japan Trip, I will have a few days remainding of the Easter holidays. I made a deal that dad and I visit Ji-Shen down in Melbourne for a weekend in Term 2. By then, I'd be all ready to go home for the winter holidays.

I don't think I have everything I need to have done, done. I still have accessories I need to buy, like toothbrushes, stationary, etc. I still need to find a decent jacket/sweater to replace my worn-out Singaporean one, and a new pair of khaki shorts to replace my already tearing apart Espirit ones now. I also need to visit the opticians to get my spectacles adjusted, and look for last minute DVDs to last me 6 months. Oh, and not to forget - I must see dad before I go, also because he owes us pocket money for the term; and my good friend Su-Yi, who I need to say goodbye to properly.

Ah, so much to do and so little time to do it all. I even have maths study, which is a constant kind of effort and a History Extension essay proposal to write and a Japanese letter to write for sensei and an English essay on four texts about the Imaginative Journey.

Sigh. I have a sorethroat.
I think it's from all the singing yesterday. Damn, I hope I don't get sick :\

Cheers.

--

1. Daniel Craig, or a Daniel Craig.
   
2. Ewan McGregor, or a Ewan McGregor xDDD (Yes, I am totally aware that these first two are so totally impossible!)
3. Bond On Set book.
4. Sennheiser PX100 headphones, and a pair of Sennheiser's white in-ear bud earphones (can't remember what the actual name is!)
   
5. An easy-to-do/use coffee machine. One that is small, and won't make too much of a mess to clean up. One for the boarding house, to keep in my room. Coffee is going to be my best friend for the entire year. Mm, I can smell it already...

I can finally play a song on the guitar while singing along to it. Of course, I'm not great at it - but with time, I will perfect it. Thank goodness for all the Singstar practice I've recently been having. XDDD

Cheerrrrrrrs.

I love this ad.



I recently watched another Daniel Craig movie, Munich also starring Eric Bana. It's about the aftermath of what happened at the Munich Olympic games in 1972 (I think it was '72), and it's great. Night before that, I put on Layer Cake, which Daniel stars as the lead. If you liked Snatch, you will definately love Layer Cake :)

I just want to fscking glomp this man. <3333333


Melissa, one of my boarding dormies was down in KL for a few days, so mum, my sister and I went to take her out around town. We spent a few hours at Central Market, looking at little antiques, crafts and cultural things. Then we headed inside to Petaling Street to shop for fake goods. Melissa showed us that she has the bargaining skills of Malaysian. She made us proud when she brought a RM120 LV bag with excellent leather (and real, too) down to RM40. We even used the walk-away technique, where the merchant calls out after you to give you your lowest price. It was great fun. We crashed back at our apartment, chilled for a bit and played Singstar for a while, before heading out to dinner. Yay, the Raerae got to go out again. :]

Off to help Scofield break out of Fox River in Prison Break.

Cheers!

A few days ago, my dad's apartment was broken into. To our surprise and possibly himself and his wife, his expensive watches, her expensive jewellery, handbags, shoes, electronics and other little valuables were left untouched. Only one item was taken -- their safe.

Their safe included cash, very expensive valuables and most important of all, their passports. It probably included some important documents too. The funny thing was it wasn't a forced entry into their apartment. The robbers possibly had a key to their lock, or a skilled lock-picker. Robbers, too. There was definately more than one. I mean, we're dealing with a safe built to keep things in - think about what it's made of, something hard, heavy and tough, and definately not easy to break.

The thing is, my maid, who we've known for fifteen years and counting (she took care of me from when I was a wee one), works part-time for my dad. She goes over there twice a week to clean up, wash and iron clothes and etc. After she cleans up at his place, she comes over to our apartment to stay with us. Usually it's for most of the week, unless she's got other errands to run. She was the only other person who had a copy of dad's apartment keys.

My maid is currently somewhere at the Brickfields police station, a dodgy area full of nobodies, weirdos and creeps. She's locked up in a cell, forced to stay under the "careful" watch of the police and investigators. She is their main suspect.

Frankly, she couldn't have done it. Why would she steal a fscking safe, which she probably wouldn't be able to open because you'd need a password or something? Right? If she was that kind of person, during New Years while my dad and stepmum were on a boat somewhere off the coast of the Malaysian peninsular, she could have snuck into their apartment (because you know, she's the only other one with the key) and stolen their stuff. Or, while she cleans their place twice a week, you know she handles their stuff, especially the jewellery and watches they leave around, she could have taken them and left. But no, she never did that. We trust her anyway, we know she would never do it.

Yesterday, mum and I went to visit her at the police station. It was my first visit to a police station, and I must say ohmyGod - our country, Malaysia, is being protected by a police force that is by far the most dodgy and uncivilised. When we walked through the gates, and around the compound, there were all these weirdos wandering around aimlessly (as they seemed to me). Each time you passed someone, they'd look at you with suspicious minds - why are you here, what was your crime. It was creepy. Mum and I had to wait almost an hour for the investigator to give us the OK-to-go signal to see our maid. I listened to my iPod (thank God I brought it along) while waiting, and mum tried her best to watch the dodgy Bollywood movie which was on TV. The investigators were animalistic. They shuffled their feet, reluctant to pick them off the ground as they walked wandered around, in and out of the room. Cigarettes hanging off of their mouthes. There was a stench too, a mixture of sweat, tobacco and coffee. It was, what I call, super dodgy. Mum couldn't agree more.

Our maid is fine anyway. She's hanging in there. People still want to question her and collect statements from her about what had happened. We saw her, had a chat with her and one of the investigators (who was much nicer than the ones we saw before) and continued to vouch for our maid's integrity. There were other things that the police missed out on - other possible suspects who they never thought about.

But then again, people are wronged everyday. Unfortunate, but it happens.

Which reminds me, I'd just started watching Prison Break after endless nagging from Jude to watch her Wenty the show. It's great! Another thing to get hooked on, along with Greys and House and Desperate Housewives...

And of course, a new addition to my list of love interests (the list actually has one name on it, namely Mr McGregor ♥)... I present to you,


Cheers x)

It's been one week and I'm still sick. A little better, but sick. My sinuses are all mucked up, and my cough is starting to give me chest pains. I've used up four tissue boxes in the past three days. The outer part of my nose is so dry from all the times I blow my nose.

My voice isn't as bad though. Not anymore. I feel that I'm getting better. But the cough. The cough that gives me a kick in the chest. It really hurts. I was so worried that I looked up the symptoms of bird flu, just to check if I've been diagnosed with it.

No, I don't have bird flu. I think I don't anyway. I've been trying to avoid the doctors for as long as I can because if I go, I'll have to get an influenza jab. And you know, me + needles = just don't go together.

I've been dying to get out of the house. I want to have another party or get together, a HALO thing or whatever. I'm so tired of being housed in because of this cold. Flu. Whatever.

On the bright side, I get the chance to finish up some work and study. I've even done half of my Modern History work already! I'm on a roll!

Cheers.

Usually, a week or two after I write my New Year resolutions, I completely forget about them. They'll come back as small thought, once in a while - then disappear to the back of my mind, floating around, waiting to be caught. This time, I'd like to really try them. I want to challenge myself. It'll give me something to aim for, like a goal. It's nice to have more purpose in your life, don't you agree?

So here they are, my 2007 New Year Resolutions.

#1. Make new friends.

--

There they are, the 7 big ones.
Have you written your New Year resolutions down yet? It always helps when you write things down. You know, make a list! I like lists, as I mentioned before. I'm sure you do too.

Cheers.
PS. Been so goddamn sick that I've lost my voice, and can't go out to see friends or anything. I'm a nice person. I don't want my buddies to catch my germs :( *hack*